Thursday, April 5, 2012

Cognition

This will probably be one of my hardest posts to you. It is important though to know how your past and how child abuse has affected your cognitive skills. I have debated what order to talk about your different areas of need in and how each aspect has influenced your life differently. Cognition and academic ability are really like an umbrella over everything. It affects behaviors, language, social, etc. I think more importantly I needed to be ready to talk about it to you.

Recently, now that more pieces are starting to fall into place for you it has become more obvious how impacted your cognitive skills are at this time and the intensive teaching you will require for years to come to continue to make progress. When you first came to me at the age of 5 I used to say you were about 12 months developmentally. No concept of pre-academic or foundational skills, not toilet trained, could not walk up and down stairs, did not know how to use utensils, no language, limited social, and the list went on. I remember you trying to eat the stick of a popcicle and holding it by the frozen end because you didn't know any better, eating cereal with milk with your hands because you did not have a clue what a spoon was, and trying to eat the cards for the memory game because there was no concept of using them in any other way. Thinking back on it today I am not even sure we could say 12 months developmentally in some areas as it was probably lower.

Neglect caused you to miss exposure to language skills. It caused you to miss social opportunities every child needs and thrives off of. It caused you to be so under developed that you were no where near ready to conquer these skills. The neglect you experienced meant that no one talked to you daily. No one labeled items in your environment or showed you how to complete tasks such as cause and effect toys, puzzles, building blocks, or simply singing songs. You had no one to imitate or interact with.

Abuse caused you to fear being wrong and to seek permission for everything you did. Abuse caused you to stop trying to learn new skills because there was no motivation, reinforcement, or even opportunities for you to apply skills if you did learn them. Abuse caused you to become aversive to adults working with you and to fight the system of anyone trying to help you.

Drug exposure..... Yes, the big one here.... Drug exposure has impacted your ability to learn new skills. Drug exposure altered your chemistry, the structure of your brain development, and built barriers to being able to move forward. Drug exposure made you lose a sense of yourself. It dulled your cognitive ability, your personality, and your rate of acquisition. We all see what meth does to adults, just imagine what it did to your developing body and brain in those early and vital years.

All three of these areas have impacted your ability, even today, to continue to make strides academically. Recently I have had a really hard time admitting this and coming to terms with the full extent of your disability and how it affects your cognitive ability. This does not mean I am changing my expectations or hopes and dreams for you but it does mean I have to be grounded in my approach and our day to day lives. Today your language is probably equivalent to about 24 months (with the use of your device), your early academic skills about 36 months, gross motor development around 36 months. Your social skills are closer to a four year old but it is difficult given your delays in other areas to keep up socially. I struggle because I want to say that in the two years you have been home that you have mastered these skills and that we are working towards more age appropriate concepts but alas, I have to admit, we have not.

It has not been until about the last six months, with our move to Ohio, that you are even more available to learn these skills. We have had to work through so many obstacles caused by your past that have affected your willingness and your ability that we are just now at a point that i am starting to see the spark. Just now, at the age of 8 are you showing that you are ready to start understanding some of these concepts and move through these skills in a very systematic and broken down way.

I think it is also these last six months that have put into perspective to me where your skills lie and that I am wonder why two years ago I even attempted colors or shapes. Why two years ago I was getting angry when you didn't understand multi-step directions when they were given to you, that your pants went on your legs and your shirt over your head, or that you were supposed to sit down at a table and eat a full meal.

We have made so many gains and you have grown and developed in all areas. Abuse, neglect, and drugs have impacted the child you are today and have influenced your thought process. More importantly though, you are pulling through and you are thriving to learn more. You are bucking the system less and allowing those close to you to help you. Recently you have shown me your passion for animals - anything from zoo and farm animals to household pets. You have shown me that math and science are much stronger subjects for you and you have so much more interest in them then reading. That skills such as colors and shapes really have no meaning to you but you can label money with your eyes closed and will happily count and tell me how many pieces of candy you have (as long as you get to eat if afterwards). We will build off of these motivations and I know you will continue to make progress - it is just difficult sometimes to watch how hard you work and yet still have so far to go.

Keep On Truckin Baby
Love
Mom

No comments:

Post a Comment