Deep Breath

Bryson,

I love you with all my heart. I cannot imagine my life without and I know you are meant to be my child. There are times though when I need to take a deep breath. When I need to shut the door behind me and take a moment before I walk back in to finish the task. The is normal though... I know all parents go through this. I know it is bonding, it is emotions, and it is pure and simple parenting.

Things week Jenny has been in town with Shelby, Donald, and Taylor. You have definitely tested all the boundries to include taking off your diaper at nap time and urinating all over your room. You are hitting, yelling, kicking, urinating, and just plain and simple pushing every button you can. Its never a good thing when I pull over on the road, pull you out of the car, and put you in time out behind the car because you are yelling at me and hitting and kicking my seat. We an only go up from here right? Well, one would think but you still needed to push a little further and decided to urinate in your bedroom three times within two hours. We will get there - I know we will but that was our low point this week.

I wonder what is going through your little head though. Do you think these other children are staying? Is it to off schedule for you to follow? Do you just like to simply push the buttons?

Many people have mentioned to pick and choose my battles - My question to them is which battles would you give up on? You eventually live up to every expectation I set for you. You realize boundries and even though you test them, you strive off of them. You potty trained in less then a month, you play appropriately with toys, you use some of your pictures to communicate, you come when called, you listen to instruction, and you know when you are trouble. If I start to choose what battles to pick then I know you will play the system.

"Learned Helplessness" has served you well for so long it will take us years to break this cycle.

We are so excited though Bryson. On Monday you will start school. You will only go to this school for the month of August on Monday, Wednesday, and Fridays from 830-330. This school is based upon ABA therapy and actually you are the only student registered for August so you will receive one on one therapy. This is wonderful and I think will be the push you need to continue moving forward. In September you will go to a typical preschool at Sterling United Methodist Church with a shadow. Again, this will be huge for you. The strides will continue to come.

I worry about your emotional status as we push so much socially and academically and you make so much progress. We will battle this hurdle when it comes but for now keep on truckin baby


Love you more then all the sand in all the world

Mom

By the way - the above picture is when you finally gave in the other night and went to sleep